I speak to people all the time who are reluctant to celebrate when things go well, when they feel happy, or when they have something to shout about. We feel judged. We think people will think we are boastful or that we are oversharing.
Many of us have been taught that sharing our successes or proud moments is wrong or shameful. But what is boastful? What is oversharing (as opposed to just sharing)?
My view is that if we focus on the negative, we get more negativity. If we shame ourselves, we are quick to turn that shame onto others.
If we hide the things that we are proud of, how will we ever be able to connect with one another with empathy and vulnerability?
I honestly don't know where I'd be if other people did not share the inspiring things they do, the unique thoughts they have, or the actions they take that make the world better.
What I've decided is important to me is to have filters that I pass my posts through before sharing them with the world. I don't always get it right, and when I get it wrong, I try to practice compassion for myself, curiosity for others, and I take my learnings. Getting clear on my values has helped me considerably in this task, and I am always learning and making adjustments.
Another thing I do is to assume I am writing to people who care about me and want me to succeed. This helps me to stop playing small. And it is a challenge to do this while my inner critic tries to remind me of all the things that could go wrong.
The truth is, it takes courage to share your real self. It takes courage to give yourself permission to let people see you, celebrate with you, and yes, even judge you. These are all opportunities to practice empathy and compassion, and to learn about ourselves and how we can grow through adversity.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this!
Our second Authentic Leadership Conversationᵀᴹ event in St. John's, NL was a positive and supportive way to explore the difficult conversations we have been avoiding or those we feel like we want to have!
Thank you to the group of energetic, kind, strong and funny women who attended, shared, and allowed themselves to get vulnerable in this space. Every event feels like such a gift and I can see the energy and thoughtfulness when people walk away from the conversation.
Thank you to Emilee at Moxie's Grill & Bar - St. John's who took care of us so professionally, and to the kitchen staff who prepared our tasty meals (presented beautifully). It is a pleasure to be able to host these events in this venue.
If you are curious about our dinner series, you can find all of the details here. The next one is August 15: "How can I cultivate work-life balance?"
Looking forward to seeing you there!